An edition of The Unexpurgated Code (1975)

The unexpurgated code

a complete manual of survival & manners

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Last edited by Drini
June 8, 2025 | History
An edition of The Unexpurgated Code (1975)

The unexpurgated code

a complete manual of survival & manners

  • 5.0 (1 rating)
  • 46 Want to read
  • 8 Currently reading

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Publish Date
Language
English
Pages
283

Buy this book

Previews available in: English

Edition Availability
Cover of: Unexpurgated Code
Unexpurgated Code
2012, Lilliput Press, Limited, The
in English
Cover of: Unexpurgated Code
Unexpurgated Code: A Complete Manual of Survival & Manners
September 1979, Dell Publishing Co
in English
Cover of: The Unexpurgated Code
The Unexpurgated Code: A Complete Manual of Survival & Manners
1979, Dell Publishing
in English
Cover of: The unexpurgated code
The unexpurgated code: a complete manual of survival & manners
1976, Dell Publishing Co, Dell Publishing
in English
Cover of: Unexpurgated Code
Unexpurgated Code
1976, Delta
Cover of: Unexpurgated Code
Unexpurgated Code
1976, Delta
Paperback
Cover of: The Unexpurgated Code
The Unexpurgated Code: A Complete Manual of Survival and Manners
September 1976, DoubleDay
Paperback
Cover of: The Unexpurgated Code
The Unexpurgated Code: a complete manual of survival and manners
1975, Delacorte Press/S. Lawrence
in English
Cover of: The Unexpurgated Code a Complete Manual of Survival and Manners
The Unexpurgated Code a Complete Manual of Survival and Manners
June 1975, Ultramarine Pub Co
Hardcover
Cover of: The unexpurgated code
The unexpurgated code: a complete manual of survival & manners
1975, Wildwood House
in English

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Book Details


Table of Contents

Social Climbing
Upon Being Not to the Manner Born
Page 3
Useful Rules in Social Climbing
Page 4
Finding a Social Circle Which Spirals Upwards
Page 6
Accent Improvement
Page 9
Upon Embellishing Your Background
Page 11
Upon Embellishing the Area in Which You Reside
Page 13
Upon Choosing Your Residence
Page 14
Upon Choosing Your Neighbour
Page 16
Upon Your Residence's Appurtenances
Page 17
Upon Refining Your Taste
Page 18
Upon Throwing Your First Large Party
Page 20
Upon Not Being Socially Registered
Page 22
Upon Being Excluded from Who's Who
Page 23
Upon the Sudden Reawakening of Your Sordid Background
Page 25
Name Changing
Page 27
Ass Kissing and Other Types of Flattery
Page 29
On Rubbing Elbows with the Rich
Page 30
Associating with the Bootless and Unhorsed
Page 38
Knowing When You Have Reached the Top
Page 42
Extinctions and Mortalities
The Final Resting Place
Page 49
Upon Being Told the Fatal News That You Have Only So Long to Live and That It Is Not Long
Page 51
Dying
Page 53
Wills, Legacies, Chattels
Page 55
Suicide
Page 58
Parting Words, Gestures, Apparel and Conversations
Page 62
Execution
Page 64
At the Funeral
Page 66
Cannibalism
Page 70
The Duel
Page 73
At the Duelling Site
Page 76
Impromptu Combat
Page 79
Upon Making the Contract for the Rubout
Page 84
Upon Abandoning Ship
Page 87
Upon Abandoning the Aircraft
Page 91
The Drunken Lout Loose in the Aircraft
Page 93
Upon Being Hijacked
Page 95
Upon Your Dog Killing Another
Page 96
Upon Your Dog Being Killed by Another
Page 97
Upon Being a Victim at the Hospital
Page 98
Upon Dying of Shame
Page 101
Euthanasia
Page 102
Posterity
Page 103
Vilenesses Various
Farting
Page 107
Bodily Stench
Page 112
Bad Breath and Toothpicks
Page 114
Other Orifices, Ears and Enemas
Page 115
Hocking, Spitting and Throat Clearing
Page 117
Smoking
Page 119
Plate and Knife Licking
Page 120
Shaving
Page 121
Baldness
Page 122
Dentures
Page 123
Dandruff
Page 124
Promiscuous Pissing
Page 124
Pimple and Black Head Squeezing
Page 126
Discarded Hairs and Nails
Page 126
Solitary Masturbation
Page 127
The Vicissitudes of Clap
Page 128
Upon Being Clapped Up
Page 128
Naming Names of Clapper Uppers
Page 129
Upon Confronting the Clapped Up
Page 129
Upon Placing the Blame for Venereal Infection
Page 131
The Syph
Page 132
The Crab Louse
Page 133
The Flea
Page 135
The Sneaky Doing of the Reprehensible
Page 135
In Pursuit of Comfortable Habits
At the Breast
Page 139
In the Cradle
Page 139
In Your High Chair
Page 140
Upon Throwing Objects Out of Your Perambulator
Page 140
Beginning Your Daily Adult Day
Page 140
Toilet
Page 141
Upon Clothing and Appearances
Page 142
Upon Having One's Ultimate Kit
Page 143
Visiting Your Banker
Page 147
Visiting Your Bank
Page 148
At the Barber
Page 148
At the Chiropodist
Page 150
The Shoeshine
Page 151
At the Porno Show
Page 151
At the Massage Parlour
Page 153
Upon Saucy Assemblages
Page 156
In the Proximity of the Horse
Page 158
At the Stud Sale
Page 159
The Willing 'Let's Go Gang' Guest
Page 212
Upon a Commoner Encountering a Member of the Titled Classes
Page 212
Upon Being a Member of the Titled Classes
Page 213
The Wife's Disappearance at the Country House Party
Page 214
Food Throwers
Page 216
Upon Encountering Strange and Suspicious Noises
Page 216
Upon Changing Your Sex
Page 217
Upon Nude Encounters with Servants
Page 218
Upon Being of a Colour in an Area Where Such Colour Is Not Highly Esteemed
Page 218
Upon Some Guest's Kid Abusing Your Chattels
Page 218
Upon Suffering Social Descent as a Member of the Gentry to the Lower Classes
Page 219
The Au Pair
Page 220
Upon Inheriting a Title or Gaining Rank
Page 221
Attending the Reading of Wills
Page 221
Upon Encountering Massive Windfalls
Page 221
Upon Being Sued
Page 222
When the World Rats on You
Page 222
Upon Inlaws Moving In or Trying to Commandeer Your Property
Page 223
Upon Stabbing Folk in the Back
Page 223
Upon Doing the Decent Thing in the Face of Many Juicy and Shoddy Alternatives
Page 223
Upon Presenting Yourself before an Investigating Committee
Page 224
Upon Replying to Interrogation
Page 225
Upon Committing Perjury
Page 225
Upon Bad Mouthing an Enemy
Page 226
Upon Being Published in a Debtors' Gazette
Page 226
Upon the Bailiff or Sheriff Arriving to Possess Goods
Page 227
Upon Doing unto Others as They Would So Treacherously Delight to Do unto You
Page 227
Upon Being Unflatteringly Dressed in an Emergency
Page 227
Upon Letting Your Lawn Grass Grow Long
Page 228
Upon Being Made Aware of an Insult to Your Hotel Companion
Page 228
Upon Paying the Bill in a Restaurant
Page 229
Upon Inducing Folk to Eat Cheap When You Have Invited Them to Dine
Page 229
Upon Becoming Sick on or Objecting to a Restaurant's Food
Page 230
Face Lifting and Plastic Surgery
Page 231
Upon Suing Your Hosts for Injury in Their House
Page 232
Mischiefs and Memorabilia
Upon Being Cuckolded
Page 235
Mirrors
Page 237
Upon Observing Folk Who Appear So Overly Sure of Themselves
Page 238
Facial Expressions
Page 238
Displaying Your Medals and Decorations
Page 239
Upon Walking into Places as If You Own Them
Page 239
Upon Feeling Out of Place
Page 239
Upon Folk Putting Their Feet Up on Your Furniture
Page 240
Upon Travelling in Space
Page 240
Upon Being a Big Shot
Page 241
Perils and Precautions
Upon Being Stung on the End of Your Prick by a Bee on a Golf Course
Page 193
Dealing with the Insane
Page 194
In the Elevator
Page 194
Angers
Page 195
Upon Coming Upon Two Citizens Engaged in a Fight
Page 195
Upon Witnessing an Indoor Nuisance Befalling a Lady
Page 196
Upon People Walking Straight into Pools and Water Filled Excavations and There Being Immersed Headlong
Page 196
Upon Your Spit Landing on Another
Page 197
Upon a Fair Fight
Page 198
The Mugger
Page 199
To Avoid Attack
Page 200
Upon Giving Assistance to One Attacked
Page 200
As a Pedestrian
Page 201
As a Motorist
Page 201
Upon Confronting a Burglar
Page 202
Upon Encountering Incivilities from Taxi Drivers
Page 203
Upon Helping Ladies Too Fat for Taxis to Get in One
Page 205
Fat Ladies in Phone Booths
Page 205
When the Overwhelming Desire to Goose a Lady Cannot Be Suppressed
Page 206
Upon Having Without Invitation an Uncontrolled Erection
Page 207
Upon Being Exorcised
Page 207
When an Undesirable Moves In Next Door
Page 207
Suburban Boundaries
Page 208
Plumbing
Page 209
As a House Guest
Page 209
Upon Shortening a Guest's Stay upon the Country Estate
Page 210
Upon Being Required to Work as a Guest
Page 211
Upon Ennobling Your Noble Spirit
Page 241
Upon Being Cultured
Page 242
Upon Being Unknown
Page 242
Fame and Celebrity
Page 242
Upon the Display of Sun Tan
Page 243
On Tipping
Page 243
Upon Being Snubbed
Page 243
When You Are Laughed At
Page 244
Upon People's Attention Wandering as You Talk
Page 245
Upon Accepting Prizes, Awards, and Distinctions
Page 245
Upon Contributing Money
Page 245
Upon Using People for What They're Worth
Page 246
Upon Living and Let Live
Page 246
Upon Heaping Abuse on the High and Mighty
Page 246
Upon Being High and Mighty with the Low and Weak Heaping Abuse
Page 247
Upon Being a Sportsman
Page 247
Upon Accosting Your Trusted Manager or Accountant Who Has Been Cheating You over a Long Number of Years
Page 247
Upon Being Puzzled by the Meaning of Life
Page 248
Upon the Pointy Two Toned Shoe
Page 248
Upon the Light Tan Shoe
Page 249
Upon Being Done the Tiniest of Courtesies
Page 249
Upon Those Who Lack the Basic Human Decencies
Page 250
On Wielding Disparaging and Chastening Terms Various
Page 250
Terms of Reference for Disapproved Folk
Page 251
Four Letter Words
Page 252
The Unforgivable Insult
Page 253
Handy Sayings
Page 253
Upon the Proper Haughty Posture for the Delivery of Insult
Page 254
In Extra Ordinary Pukka Conversation
Page 254
Verbal Invitations
Page 254
Trembling Your Lid Before Flipping It
Page 255
Handshaking
Page 255
Bowing
Page 256
Upon Introduction
Page 257
Name Dropping
Page 257
Gatecrashing
Page 257
Upon Doing Surreptitious Damage at Your Host's Party
Page 258
Dancing
Page 258
The Telephone
Page 259
Receiving Letters
Page 259
Letter Writing
Page 260
Upon Writing the Annual Mimeographed Dear Friends Letter
Page 260
Upon Replying to an Unexpurgated Form Letter
Page 261
Christmas
Page 262
Servants
Page 263
On Being a Good Butler
Page 263
Upon the Conduct of Business Negotiations
Page 264
Upon Being Interviewed
Page 265
Upon Hiring a Secretary
Page 266
Duties as a Citizen
Page 266
Vacating Your Seat on Public Transport
Page 267
Upon Glances at Ladies
Page 267
How to Prevent People from Detesting You
Page 268
Calling Cards
Page 268
Living in Your Own Little Enclosed World of Privilege and Liking It a Whole Bunch
Page 269
On Taking Free Reads of Newspaper Headlines
Page 269
Upon Fouling the Footpath
Page 269
Upon Ordering Kit
Page 270
Upon Robbing a Bank
Page 270
Having Successfully Robbed a Bank
Page 271
Philosophy
Page 272
Blowing upon Soup
Page 272
Upon Opening Your Stately Home to the Public
Page 272
Upon the Nearby Arrival of a Flying Saucer
Page 272
Wife Beating
Page 273
Upon Being to the Manner Born
Page 274
When Blackballed from a Club to Which You Have Desperately Tried to Gain Admittance
Page 274
Upon Having Your Picture Taken with Famous People
Page 275
Hotels
Page 275
Upon a Lady Exhibiting a Motion Picture of Her Saucy Antics
Page 276
Upon Encountering Happiness
Page 276
Upon the Untoward in the Pissoir
Page 276
Upon Being Old
Page 278
Upon Disappearing
Page 278
Upon Exercising a Realistic Thought
Page 278
The Psychologist
Page 279
Upon Biting the Hand That Feeds You
Page 279
Forgiveness
Page 279
Upon Expecting Fair Play in High Places
Page 279
When Some Supercilious Cunt Asks Is There Anything Wrong
Page 279
The Old School Tie
Page 279
Charm
Page 280
Upon Various Races Venturing Abroad
Page 280
Upon Being Down and Out
Page 280
Meditation
Page 280
Religions
Page 281
Caution
Page 281
Shabby People
Page 281
Shabby Shabby People
Page 282
Shabby Shabby Shabby People
Page 282
Upon Good Manners Honour and Duty Getting You Absolutely Nowhere
Page 282
Ingredients for Survival
Page 283
Epitaph
Page 283

Edition Notes

1979 printing.

1

Published in
New York, NY
Series
A Delta book

Classifications

Library of Congress
PS'3507'O686'U6'1976

The Physical Object

Pagination
viii, 283 p. :
Number of pages
283

Edition Identifiers

Open Library
OL20309384M
Internet Archive
unexpurgatedcode0000jpdo
ISBN 10
0440592291
LibraryThing
171284
Goodreads
4849

Work Identifiers

Work ID
OL726621W

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June 8, 2025 Edited by Drini //covers.openlibrary.org/b/id/15092674-S.jpg
June 8, 2025 Edited by Drini Add TOC from Tocky
June 8, 2025 Edited by Drini import existing book
April 8, 2025 Edited by Tauriel063 Merge works (MRID: 203906)
October 26, 2008 Created by ImportBot Imported from The Laurentian Library MARC record